Young couples pay the price for marrying too soon

A growing number of young city dwellers are choosing to get married soon after they graduate from college

　　A growing number of young city dwellers are choosing to get married soon after they graduate from college, despite not being financially independent.

　　Last year, for example, Shanghai's Xuhui District Civil Affairs Bureau saw 1,221 college graduates aged 22 to 24 tie the knot, up 50 percent on the previous year.

　　Of those, there were more newly graduated brides than there were grooms, Xinhua said.

　　But without financial security, married life is no bed of roses, experts have said.

　　One young Beijing couple, for example, Liu Hao and Wang Ni, rely heavily on financial support from their parents, as their monthly outgoings surpass their income.

　　In addition, Liu's mother sometimes has to call to wake them for work, and she makes regular weekend visits to take care of their cooking, washing, cleaning and even pays their bills.

　　"Most of the young people who get married soon after graduating from college are from relatively well-off families, and they long for a stable and comfortable life.

　　"However, they still have a lot to learn from society before they are ready for marriage.

　　Sun Baohong, an expert with the Institute of Adolescents under the Shanghai Academy of Social Sciences

　　Zhang Da, 24, who got married last summer just after graduating from a college in Tianjin

　　"I got married so early simply because my parents had already prepared an apartment for me.

　　"But I still pretended to be single at work, as colleagues my age are all single and it is a bit weird for them to know I am married. Also, I am afraid they would leave me out of social activities if they saw me as a family man.

　　"I don't think I am yet ready to accept my new identity as a married man."

　　Zhu Ke, 23, who got married at the end of last year after graduating from a college in Shanghai

　　"I felt great pressure to find a good job after graduation so I chose to marry a man who loves me and is willing to shoulder my burden.

　　"But it's still a bit weird when my former classmates talk about their new single lives at our get-togethers while I am worrying about things like how to pay for the house, when to visit his parents and even when to have a baby.

　　"The intimacy between me and my friends is vanishing, and I feel I am missing out on a period of time that should be the happiest for a girl my age."

　　"Getting married soon after graduation can result in both psychological and economic problems. A young couple have no idea of what difficulties may confront them in their work, their family life and even from society. Their impulsive decision to marry might well undermine the marriage in the long run.

　　Wu Zebin, a master's degree holder in sociology with Peking Universty

　　如今，大学毕业后不久就结婚的都市年轻人越来越多，尽管此时他们在经济上还没有独立。

　　比如，据上海市徐汇区民政局去年的统计数据显示，在22岁至24岁的大学毕业生中，有1221人结婚，比上一年增加了50%。

　　据新华社报道，其中结婚的女大学毕业生比男毕业生多。

　　但有关专家认为，没有经济基础作保障，婚后生活不会幸福。

　　北京一对年轻夫妇刘浩和王妮由于入不敷出，只能靠父母为他们提供大量经济支持。

　　此外，刘浩的母亲有时还打电话叫他们起床，每周末去给他们做饭、洗衣服、打扫卫生、甚至帮他们处理一些账单。

　　上海社会科学研究院青少年研究所的专家孙宝宏说：“大学毕业后就结婚的年轻人大多家庭条件比较好，他们渴望过稳定安逸的生活。”

　　“然而，在此之前，他们其实还需要从社会上学习很多东西。”

　　张达，24岁，天津某大学毕业生，去年夏天结婚--

　　“父母已经为我准备了一套房子，所以我早早的就结了婚。”

　　“但我在单位还得装作是单身，因为和我同龄的同事们都还没结婚，如果他们知道我已经结婚了，一定会觉得有点怪。而且我担心他们把我看成有家的人，不带我玩了。”

　　“我还无法接受已婚这一身份。”

　　朱可，23岁，上海某大学毕业生，去年年底结婚--

　　“毕业后找份好工作的压力太大了，所以我决定嫁给一个爱我的、愿意替我分忧解难的男人。”

　　“但每当聚会时听以前的同学聊起他们毕业后的新单身生活时，总感觉有点怪，我现在担心的已经是如何付房款、什么时候看望父母、甚至什么时候要孩子这些问题了。”

　　“我和朋友的关系也渐渐淡了，我觉得自己错过了我这个年龄的女孩人生中最快乐的时光。”

　　武泽斌，北京大学社会学硕士--

　　“毕业后很快结婚可能会导致心理问题及经济问题的出现。年轻夫妇对工作、家庭生活及社会中可能会出现的困难估计不足。从长远来看，一时冲动可能会破坏婚姻的质量。”

　　Vocabulary:

　　outgoing  :开支